Jem turns 30 next year, and thanks to me and my Big Mouth, it now falls upon me to organise a birthday party for this age-related milestone.
I’m still not 100% sure how I volunteered myself for this task, but Jem assures me that I did, legitimately and without coercion.
The good news is that I have already organised a venue, thanks to Kirsty at work giving me some super ideas of places that I could enquire to about it. I’ve found a venue that is quite close to the train station and also relatively close to the Premier Inn in Shrewsbury, which will be handy not only for some of the partygoers but likely also for Jem and myself – I can’t imagine we’re going to be in a fit state to drive back to Broseley that evening.
So, what else do I need to organise? Well, my list currently stands at:
- DJ or other musical entertainment
- Room and table decorations
- Hiring pole-dancing equipment (don’t ask)
- Fancy dress, or some sort of theme perhaps?
- A marching band
- A videographer
- Two turtle doves
- Commissioning a special 30th birthday dress to be made especially for Jem
- Production of 30 candles laced with vodka
- Procurement of vodka
- Hiring a skywriter to write directions to the venue from the train station in the air
- A bouncy castle
- and finally, some sort of cat-themed cabaret act
As you can see, I’ve got my work cut out for me! Good thing that I don’t really need to keep it a surprise, I’m terrible at that sort of thing.